Things I Should Never See: Keeping Tabs
I am frequently found on my high pedestal looking down upon my minions, not because I am a popular author, but because I don't care that I'm not a popular author. It's a widely known fact that I'm convinced at least 50% of the population of the site are mildly retarded and what remains are still only a notch above completely brain dead. There are, of course, the cream of the crop - a smattering of people who are simultaneously good writers and intelligent people with whom I can carry out a conversation with without begging for death.
Once more, my high horse and I embark upon a pretentious road to bitch about your syntax.
At the risk of sounding like a boot camp instructor, who the fuck taught most of you how to write a narrative paragraph? This is not a court record ladies and gentlemen. I do not need to know what every person in the room was doing at all times. Again, I say, if you aren't speaking to a larger point, it shouldn't be in your story.
Unless it is imperative to your characterization that we know that Ron agreed with Harry and would be heading off in a moments time to spy on a Slytherin, leave it out. A sentence that reads "Ron agreed with Harry and Hermione headed off to the Library to do some research."
No. Completely useless. Nothing about that sentence speaks to a louder point. Carrying on with my 'spying on some slytherin' scenario, I'm going to take a quick whack at a passage.
See, we've established their reactions without some feeble sentence about how everyone agreed with the plan. Grant me the fact that the above scene is abysmally written but, seeing as I through it together in the process of this article and this article has only taken me about 5 minutes to write, I'm none too disappointed with myself.
Story telling is about two things.
1. Telling the story of an event.
2. Telling the story of the characters during the event.
These pieces of fiction that we write are nothing more and nothing less than that. Surely, they may have underlying messages of friendship, faith, morality, loyalty, the dangers of war, the dangers of society and any number of other things that may be near and dear to your heart, but the overwhelming goal is to tell a story o a time and a place and a people.
While I seldom recommend considering TV anything near to writing, I'm going to use it as an exercise of sorts here - take it for what it is. Take a small scene from a TV show or a movie and write it. I don't mean, write down the dialogue and who said it, I mean for you two write the scene out. The way the light plays off of the room, the way the setting is, the way the characters move. It might help to impart that there is more to portraying a scene that simply the lines - and saying 'Ron agreed' is nothing more than glorified dialogue.
As a final reminder, because it probably needs saying again - If it doesn't speak to a greater point, it shouldn't be in your story.
Once more, my high horse and I embark upon a pretentious road to bitch about your syntax.
At the risk of sounding like a boot camp instructor, who the fuck taught most of you how to write a narrative paragraph? This is not a court record ladies and gentlemen. I do not need to know what every person in the room was doing at all times. Again, I say, if you aren't speaking to a larger point, it shouldn't be in your story.
Unless it is imperative to your characterization that we know that Ron agreed with Harry and would be heading off in a moments time to spy on a Slytherin, leave it out. A sentence that reads "Ron agreed with Harry and Hermione headed off to the Library to do some research."
No. Completely useless. Nothing about that sentence speaks to a louder point. Carrying on with my 'spying on some slytherin' scenario, I'm going to take a quick whack at a passage.
"I think we should sneak down to the grounds and see what their up to," Harry whispered through his toast, chancing a glance around the room.
They'd been planning this for months and, if all went well, their plots would be foiled tonight, Looking across at his two friends, his stomach fell. Their reactions were just as he'd predicted. Hermione looked panic stricken, her face swelling as though she had 1,000 things to say. Where Ron...Ron looked terrified, but Harry and Ron had seen each other through more than this and, pale though he looked, Harry was certain Ron would be there.
"Oh, don't say it, Hermione. I'm going, with or without your help," he hissed, pretending to shovel more potatoes onto his plate.
See, we've established their reactions without some feeble sentence about how everyone agreed with the plan. Grant me the fact that the above scene is abysmally written but, seeing as I through it together in the process of this article and this article has only taken me about 5 minutes to write, I'm none too disappointed with myself.
Story telling is about two things.
1. Telling the story of an event.
2. Telling the story of the characters during the event.
These pieces of fiction that we write are nothing more and nothing less than that. Surely, they may have underlying messages of friendship, faith, morality, loyalty, the dangers of war, the dangers of society and any number of other things that may be near and dear to your heart, but the overwhelming goal is to tell a story o a time and a place and a people.
While I seldom recommend considering TV anything near to writing, I'm going to use it as an exercise of sorts here - take it for what it is. Take a small scene from a TV show or a movie and write it. I don't mean, write down the dialogue and who said it, I mean for you two write the scene out. The way the light plays off of the room, the way the setting is, the way the characters move. It might help to impart that there is more to portraying a scene that simply the lines - and saying 'Ron agreed' is nothing more than glorified dialogue.
As a final reminder, because it probably needs saying again - If it doesn't speak to a greater point, it shouldn't be in your story.
posted by Kay at
3:57 AM
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